The Fear of Failure

“A man is great not because he doesn’t fail, a man is great because he doesn’t let failure stop him.”

All too often people are too afraid to begin in fear of how things may end. The fear of failure is an epidemic for people with big dreams. But how can you ever succeed if you never try?

What I believe helps me to conquer my fear of failure the most, is the idea that every successful entrepreneur that you hear about has failed before they had their “big break”. From Bill Gates to Steve Jobs to Walt Disney, they have all faced failure. They all tried something that didn’t work. There was a failed company before Microsoft, and Steve Jobs was fired. Countless other successful businesses only worked out on the third, fourth, or tenth tries.

Failure, if used correctly can actually be the most beneficial thing for you. Each failure brings you one step closer to your success.

How do I get over my fear of failure?

I was having a conversation with one of my closest friends about this topic the other day. She said something along the lines of “I know I have to get over it but I just don’t know how”. The truth is I don’t know either. Our conversation spiraled into several different topics. But it got me thinking about how I started to become more comfortable with failure. It starts with learning to drop your ego and taking baby steps. Start putting yourself in positions where failure is a possibility. It doesn’t have to start with your biggest dream in life. Maybe start with picking up a new hobby. Learn to try things without the promise of success. If you never try you will never know. I would rather try and fail than try and wonder what could have been.

How perfectionism is killing your dreams.

Dropping your ego is the first step to getting over your fear of failure. What is the motivation behind your actions? Are you doing it to feed into your own ego? Or are you doing it for a PASSION? Don’t let your ego stop you from following your passions.

From a young age, I always felt like I had to be the best at absolutely EVERYTHING. Something I’m sure many of you have gone through as well. I got good grades, I held leadership positions, I volunteered, and I danced in basically all of my free time. Everything I did was for the purpose of being the best, but these smaller things that I was the “best” at growing up were just the beginning. I knew I had big dreams and I knew I was going to do what it took to achieve them. What I maybe didn’t know was that it was going to take failure to achieve my goals.

My Failures

I look back at my life and remember all of the baby steps of failure that helped me become more comfortable with the concept on a larger level. The first one I can think of is AP Physics junior year of high school. I sucked at physics. It was definitely my worst class in all of high school, yet I was putting more effort into it than any other class. This drove me CRAZY. It had me thinking that I wasn’t smart, or not good enough. These thoughts are the first trap of failure. Failing doesn’t mean that you are not good enough or that you are not worthy or that you don’t deserve what you are striving for. Failure can mean a lot of things but these negative thoughts are never the answer.

Many failures later, both big and small, countless silly projects and ideas gone wrong. I have realized that all my failures have always provided me with one of two things; a lesson, or an opened door.

With failure comes the opportunity to grow, and another chance to try. I have learned to trust God with my failure, I know that with every failure there is a PURPOSE. My time will come and I appreciate each “failure” I attain until then because the real failure would be wasting my life away because I was too scared to fail.

So this is your reminder to put yourself out there, try new things, and chase your dreams because you don’t want to waste your life being too scared to truly live.

-xoxo, jenny <3