People Always Leave

“People always leave.” This title may sound harsh but hear me out. by the time you finish reading this post, you’ll understand why it’s a “good” thing.

Let me specify a bit about the dramatic phrase I chose to title this post. When I say “people always leave”, sometimes WE can be those “people”. Or sometimes it can be mutual. I am not only talking about people leaving YOUR life but just relationships ending in general.

This can be a hard pill to swallow sometimes. I’m not saying that no one stays but odds are the people in your life will change, often. This is something that I’ve become super comfortable with. Of course, I still miss people, but I can look back and appreciate the time and memories we have together.

I wasn’t always so comfortable with this idea though. Throughout elementary, middle, and high school, my friend constantly changed. Each year I had a new friend group. sometimes even different ones within the same year. It felt kind of exhausting, to be honest. I wondered why I couldn’t keep the same friends. was it me? Was I doing something wrong? From what I’ve learned to be true, the answer to those questions I used to ask myself is no. The truth is life is constantly changing. We are constantly growing. Everything is constantly moving, and we are all going in different directions. During these developmental stages of our childhoods, we’re developing into real people with actual personalities and values. with that being said, it is all too easy to outgrow friendships.

Another point I’d like to make is that just because a friendship didn’t last, that doesn’t mean it was bad. It just means it wasn’t meant to be forever. This goes for relationships too. Sometimes we need to be with certain people to learn certain lessons about ourselves. I believe that god puts people in our lives on purpose, for a purpose, and takes them out of our lives too. Everything happens for a reason.

Looking back at all of the friends I have had throughout the years, I have learned so many different lessons from each of them, while making awesome memories at the same time. While I used to feel discouraged from friendships ending I have learned to appreciate it. I feel grateful to have been able to build friendships with so many different people that brought unique lessons and memories to my life.

By my senior year of high school, I truly grew comfortable with the notion that “people always leave”. In the sense that I knew I was about to move 1200 miles away for college and was likely never going to speak to these people again. Don’t get me wrong I have a group of maybe 5 people from high school that I would still see when I am home. But moving away to college is the perfect (more drastic) example of our lives changing and us growing. My life changed, I moved on from that stage of my life, and I had to meet NEW people.

I always say, when one door opens, three more open. When one friendship ends, the opportunities for new ones are magnified. There are so many people to meet and learn from in this world. Isn’t that exciting? I always say that what I want in life is to experience everything and learn as much as I can. The more people you meet the more you can experience and learn. Sounds good to me!

At this point in my life, I view all of the friendships in my life with the very real possibility that they will be temporary. Now don’t get me wrong there are many people in my life that I have every intention of becoming a crazy old lady with, but I like to be realistic. It makes it a little bit easier when friendships do come to an end. It also makes me appreciate each moment I spend with my friends because, at the end of the day, I don’t know how much longer they’ll be in my life. It’s important to value the people in each phase of your life.

HOW TO MAKE FRIENDSHIPS ENDING EASIER?

  1. be prepared-be aware of the possibility that a friendship may not be forever before it ends
  2. acknowledge your gratitude for the time you spent with that person/those people
  3. take note of the lessons you learned from the relationship
  4. get excited to meet new people

At the end of the day, you are going to meet SO MANY more people in this life. It is okay if not everyone stays around for the long haul.

-xoxo, jenny <3